Acceptance

For months , or even years of battling between your conscious , and heart ; to know what’s right but it feels so wrong . To have given all of yourself to another that you no longer have anything left for yourself . Realizing that you have gave up your teen years and early adult life trying to fulfill everyone else’s happiness . Blaming yourself for things you couldn’t change , nor control . Refusing to leave because you realize that if you did , you’ll be leaving without your dignity .  Now your bitter , resentful , and full of self hate for not leaving before it was too late . Now your lost , and the women you once knew is no longer alive . You buried her a long time ago when you decided to disregard your worth , happiness , self respect , and dignity , so someone else can keep theirs . Now your drowning in your own sorrow , and regret . Trying to get by everyday , having to go to work with a smile on your face . Having to still be a mother , cook , clean , bathe , and teach although you just want to lay in bed all day and cry . Trying to still be that supportive friend you have always been , that strong person everyone know you as while you’re soul scream for help . The hardest part of all is acceptance . Accepting you allowed yourself to drift away , you allowed someone to strip you of your dignity, you allowed your love for someone else stop you from loving you , and knowing your worth . Acceptance of having to start from square one , but first thing first , it’s time to forgive yourself . And let the healing begin .